I actually went to Wikipedia to look up the origins of April Fool’s Day. I know, right? Me, doing research for a blog? One story of how the “holiday” started came from The Canterbury Tales. The day is set “Syn March bigan thritty dayes and two.” That Chaucer couldn’t fpell for beanf, which is probably why I never read thif fnooze feft.
I figured if I was going to write something about jokes and classic literature, I should instead check out Dante’s Divine Comedy. It has “comedy” in the name, people. Just as I suspected, the third ring of hell involves living next to my neighbor. I’m hoping that the fourth ring isn’t reserved for people who leave a bag of flaming dog poop on their neighbor’s doorstep.
Perhaps most disturbing is how I woke up to 10 spam messages on my website today. I consider this a pretty crappy (and totally overdone) April Fool’s joke. Just thought I’d share a little classic literature on the subject, in keeping with the barely discernible theme of this blog.
And there shall be a great wind from the east, blowing garbage up the asses of those who would entertain and inform via fiber optic cables and satellite communication. Burma shave.
That Nostradamus was a total genius. How could he possibly have predicted that I would be receiving comments from Penile Pustules and Anal Adventures? I’m too old and far-sighted to read captchas, which demand that your commenters decipher squiggly letters that spell out globfarts (since no machine could ever anticipate such an ambiguous code).
OK, I totally called that one in, since I borrowed the last example from an earlier blog. So sue me.
I could give you dozens of other examples of bad jokes in classic literature, if I could think of any off the top of my head (since I’ve sworn off research).
Suffice it to say, there’s a reason why people avoid the classical literature aisle at Barnes & Noble as if it were ground zero for a dirty bomb. Comedy in the classics is all about political humor on people and events that nobody cares about anymore. So let me leave you with this thought, I just pranked you by making you read through the most boring subject devised by evil high school English teachers.